Tag Archives: Domestic Violence

Barbados Police slow to act upon threats to woman. We agree that’s newsworthy.

domestic-violence

Barbados Police should have a ‘zero tolerance’ policy when it comes to domestic violence and threats to women

Sylvester Henderson Dear went to a woman’s home and threatened to do her violence. The reaction of the Royal Barbados Police Force was to warn Dear that he shouldn’t threaten violence to the woman.

Then… they let him go.

Five days later Dear returned to the woman’s home and again threatened her. Only then was he arrested and charged by police.

Do we see a pattern here?

First let me say that the Nation newspaper article about this incident Threats land man time is limited in information and background. Maybe the officers had their doubts about the veracity of the victim’s story. Maybe they thought the man was being “set up” by the woman. The article doesn’t even say that this was a domestic situation. Maybe we’re wrong when we guess it might be a domestic situation. Maybe it was a business deal gone bad.

What we do know is that the victim reported the first threats to the police, who then found Dear and “warned him”. Now that Dear is in jail after a second threat, the prosecution is claiming that the first threat was valid.

And therein lies the problem. The first threat was valid but the police let the man go with a warning. They gave him a second chance.

How many women have been injured or murdered because police gave the man “a second chance”?

Many jurisdictions have adopted a “zero tolerance” to domestic violence that removes the ability of police officers to caution and release the person who is alleged to have made threats or used violence. Once a complaint is made the police must take a proper signed statement from the victim, and the police must then act upon that statement by bringing the accused before a court immediately. No longer are the police required to be “judges on the street” because it is not the business of police to be judge and jury.

The balance is that the victim reporting the threats must carry through with testimony in court. No withdrawal of charges is allowed and if the victim does not appear in court or recants (usually “her”) accusation, the victim goes to jail. While that sounds like a tough prescription for victims it is necessary to prevent (usually women) from falsely claiming threats or violence to gain advantage in divorce and child custody matters.

The police may not appreciate having their options limited by being forced to act in what they judge to be “borderline” situations, but after a period of adjustment the police, society and men and women will treat domestic violence with the seriousness it deserves. Doing violence or making threats of violence are serious matters – but so is making complaints of the same.

In this case the victim is lucky that the man didn’t return with a knife on his second chance. The police are lucky too.

At least the man was arrested on the second occasion. I guess that means we’re making progress if the police are no longer waiting outside gated communities for four days because a security guard wouldn’t let them in to answer a domestic violence call.

Further Reading

Beat Your Wife In Barbados? You Are Protected From The Police If You Live In A Gated Community!

Do We Need Signs Like This In Barbados?

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Filed under Barbados, Crime & Law, Human Rights, Police

Why Rihanna Couldn’t Leave Chris Brown… Of Pit Bulls, Cobras, Dr. Phil and Oprah

“I’m going to beat the shit out of you when you get home. You wait and see.”

…Chris Brown as said to Robyn Rihanna Fenty. Detailed in court documents read on Oprah’s show, March 6, 2009

“Yes, low self-esteem is a well-known factor in domestic abuse dynamics. But, people don’t stay in abusive relationships because they have low self-esteem. They stay because their partner has threatened to kill them if they leave. They stay because their partner has reinforced that threat with physical abuse and stalking…”

… Anne Caroline Drake speaks of what she knows personally in her article Rihanna: Should You Stay? Should You Leave?

Rihanna Choice

Anne Caroline Drake visited our blog and left words on the Rihanna/Chris Brown saga a few times. I guess you would call Anne an activist against domestic violence and child abuse. She met President Clinton three times and that is three times more than me.

I don’t know if she ever read our articles titled Beat Your Wife In Barbados? You Are Protected From The Police If You Live In A Gated Community! and Do We Need Signs Like This In Barbados? but I think she would appreciate them.

If you care about domestic violence or if you want insight into why women and Rihanna have difficulty leaving abusers, you should read her article on Rihanna and some of the other things she writes. Anne thinks Oprah and Dr. Phil are wrong about domestic violence and she has convinced me.

Shona with Cliverton

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Filed under Barbados, Rihanna

Chris Brown Hearing To Go Ahead Monday – Rihanna May Testify About Assault

California Supreme Court Says Its Time For Chris Brown To Face The Music

Like the coward he truly is for hitting a woman, Chris Brown tried to delay his preliminary hearing into assaulting Rihanna last February. The Supreme Court of California says that the hearing is to proceed as scheduled on June 22nd. It is expected that Rihanna will testify on June 22, 2009

Rihanna & Chris Brown A Few Hours Before The Alleged Assault

Rihanna & Chris Brown A Few Hours Before The Alleged Assault

A Rap For Chris Brown

Well Chris, it’s like this...

Well Chris, it’s like this...

Even though you have money for big fancy lawyers,

It isn’t a murder trial! You don’t rate – the highest court in the State says you have a date

to face the music on Monday.

You’ve had plenty of time to prepare for the day, so HEY! for once be a man and take your medicine if you have to.

I don’t care if she hit you first. I don’t care if she was screaming throwing a hissy fit. You don’t Hit!

I don’t care if she was crazy lady moon time. ‘less you tell me she had a knife at your throat, I don’t, I won’t…

I don’t buy any story that has you laying hands on a woman… let alone bite marks. Bite Marks!

Look at you, Chris. Look at Rihanna. Hey doan ya know, she’s a little slip of a thing who coulda beat on you all night

…and not even raise a bruise.

What message are you going to deliver to the world, Chris?

Okay to beat on a woman if she hit you first? Okay to bite a woman if she won’t let go?

Okay to slap her on the face? Slam on the brakes, launch her face – into the windshield?

If you were wrong, fess up. Doan try to get more licks, ’cause then the judge gonna fall on you like a ton a bricks!

(submitted by a reader who says “apologies to Lady Ga-Ga” – which means nothing to me! 🙂 )

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Filed under Barbados

Rihanna and Slumdog Millionaire Child Actor: Both Abused, Can’t Break Free Of Abusers

LAPD Launches Investigation Into Rihanna Photo Leak

Chris Brown "Sorry"

“Never ever go back to that man. Once a man hit you it be over. Doan be foolish.”

… BFP’s Auntie Moses gives some advice for Rihanna

Rihanna Back With Chris Brown

Before the very public incident last February 8th where it is alleged that Chris Brown battered Rihanna, there were rumours on a few occasions about Rihanna sporting bruises and then expensive gifts later on.

We hoped that we were not seeing the same pattern of abuse in their relationship that we’ve all seen at one time or another with some couples. When Rihanna’s bruised face appeared on the internet many of our readers commented with their advice and hope that Rihanna would not go back to her abuser.

Rihanna has done just that: run back to the arms of the bully who beat and bit her.

I don’t care if Rihanna started the whole thing. I don’t care if she slapped or hit Brown first. I don’t care if she was going hyper because Brown received a text message from another woman.

A man must not hit a woman. Period.

But like so many women who think that some violence in a relationship is “normal”, Rihanna has returned for more abuse. He’s “sorry”, she’s “sorry”…

… until the next time.

Slumdog Millionaire Child Actor Beaten By Father – Didn’t Want To Be Shown Off

Not A Movie Scene - Child Actor Beaten By Father

Not A Movie Scene - Child Actor Beaten By Father

As usual most of the BFP crowd watched the Oscars on the satellite. I don’t know why, but this one annual event has turned into a big get-together where the girls comment on the dresses and the guys mock the celebrities who have gone to the plastic surgery clinic a few more times than they should have. (Oh those lips! LOL)

This year the attention was focused upon the big winner Slumdog Millionaire that won eight Academy Awards including Best Picture. We knew nothing of the film before the Oscars, but as we watched the clips and saw the children from the slum who had been flown over from India we talked about what would happen to them now.

Now that the ceremony is over. Now that the awards have been won and the money is rolling in. Now that their major usefulness is over.

It didn’t take long. Poor little Azharuddin went back to his home in the Mumbai Dharavi slum – exhausted from Hollywood and the flight back to India. He didn’t want to be shown off to reporters so his father beat him, the photographers photographed it and got a better story than they had hoped for. In North America or maybe even Barbados, the child welfare authorities would have been around just as soon as they saw the photos, but in Mumbai people will merely say that the child is lucky he isn’t a real slave (of which there are tens of thousands in Mumbai alone).

As for Azharuddin, he will continue to live in the slum with his abusive father who has tuberculosis. Like Chris Brown, the father made an apology and an excuse of sorts, saying “I was very sorry I did what I did… I was confused and stressed by my son’s homecoming and I did not know myself for a minute. I love my boy and I am very happy to have him home.”

People Don’t Have To Stay In Abusive Relationships

Most of us can think of a few abusive relationships we’ve seen in our neighbourhoods or workplaces. Many of us have been there ourselves. I can only hope that the very public nature of the abuse we’ve seen will cause some folks to realise that people don’t have to stay in these relationships. They don’t have to take it. Think about that the next time that you see a similar pattern developing with a friend or in the family. That is the only good that can come out of what has been shown in public with Rihanna and little Azharuddin.

Further Reading

People Magazine: Rihanna and Chris Brown Are Back Together

The Sun: Scumdad Millionaire

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Filed under Barbados, Celebrities, Ethics, Rihanna

Police Photo Of Rihanna Facial Injuries Leaked – Monster Chris Brown Did This – Bite Marks Visible?

LAPD Launches Investigation Into Rihanna Photo Leak

LAPD Launches Investigation Into Rihanna Photo Leak

Los Angeles Police have launched an investigation into the leak of a photo of Rihanna which the police say “has the appearance of one taken during an official Domestic Violence investigation.” Meaning, yes this is a photo of Rihanna taken after Chris Brown “allegedly” beat and bit her. The photo first appeared on TMZ but now it is everywhere.

Somehow I don’t think that Chris Brown will ever show his face in Barbados again – ever.

What a monster he is to do that to a woman – but in truth Chris Brown did no different than has been done by hundreds of other men on Barbados. And now an entire new generation of young men have been raised on song lyrics that portray women as objects of pleasure and domination.

Not to mention that here in Barbados, if you beat your woman in a gated community, she can scream for help all she wants but the police won’t go past the security guard at the gate. After all, its only another ho gettin’ wat be deserved by she.

Do We Need Signs Like This In Barbados?

Do We Need Signs Like This In Barbados?

Further Reading: Domestic Violence In Barbados

Beat Your Wife In Barbados? You Are Protected From The Police If You Live In A Gated Community!

Do We Need Signs Like This In Barbados?

133 Comments

Filed under Barbados, Celebrities, Crime & Law, Rihanna